Monday, July 11, 2005

Marriage is not a word, but a sentence...

Lately I have been hearing small talk around my circle, with regard to marriage and how long it lasts etc. I hear people saying, nowadays girls who are educated and working don't make the marriage last a long time and they just get a divorce so easily. Sorry I beg to differ, this is solely my opinion.

Marriages are made in heaven as the saying goes, but it has to be worked out in this earth. For a marriage to work, both have to put in an effort to make it work. The feeling that working, educated women get a divorce easily is not right in my opinion, why won’t the men be wrong at all. Are the men such saints and it’s always a women fault if the marriage does not work. It is just not the responsibility of the women to make things work even when things go wrong. Men own equal responsibility for it. Each person has to respect each others feeling, be sensitive and make life livable and not make it miserable.

26 Comments:

Blogger Vijay Ramamurthi said...

Totally agreee.
It is the responsibility of both parties to see to it that marriage works.
I am not sure where you heard this, but unfortunately it is true that women get the un-fair share of responsibility for broken marriages.
But people will talk..!! thats the way they are I guess..:)

3:42 PM  
Blogger Adaengappa !! said...

I guess a happy life is a reponsibilty of both the partners..

I got no personal experience yet..but blogged about this earlier.. TAKE A LOOK HERE... Thanks !!

3:51 PM  
Blogger Adaengappa !! said...

Can i chip a joke here ??

"Marriage Problems"

A man and woman were having marriage problems, and decided
to end their union after a very short time together. After
a most brief attempt to reconcile, the couple went to court to finalize their break-up.

The judge asked the husband, "What has brought you to this point, where you are not able to keep this marriage together?"

The husband said, "In the six weeks we've been together,we haven't been able to agree on one thing."

The wife said, "Seven weeks."

5:15 PM  
Blogger Ram.C said...

I agree AF..

Now, working women are coming out for divorces because they are able to think freely and don't want to be forced under male chauvinism. Previously, they didn't have this window to jump out. Even now, some ladie are suffering with many male chauvinists.

Male do play their part, since ego also comes into the picture which doesn't allow some of them to digest his partner coming up professionally.

So, it is not the ladies fault alone for the increased no. of divorces...

7:12 PM  
Blogger monu said...

well, i think that since working women have financial independence, they will not tolerate any excesses from the men and walk out...and thats what some people refer to as working women not trying to make their marriage work!
:(

11:54 PM  
Blogger Suguna Purushothaman said...

totally totally agree.
they say that when woman study well there comes rendu kombu. so why dont men get that as even they study. its a shit society that talks ill of a wonderful species called women.

3:35 AM  
Blogger Vivhyd said...

AF.. nice one.. truly agreeable that u get two hands to clap..both men and women are equally responsible.. but just feel that..

women who r financially independent just seem to lower their tolerance level and seem to see that divorce is an easy way out..

well ofcourse it can be true
with men too.. but just feel that it could be coming more from women.. instead of solving the problem both look for easy way out and thats when things go awry..

6:26 AM  
Blogger Aravind said...

quite rite. We have long lasting marriages but do we have happy marriages?

7:51 AM  
Blogger ioiio said...

If i go by what u post..
its not a sentence..

Its a couple of paragraphs :)

10:22 AM  
Blogger Me said...

mmm...agreed...it is like a rule that wife should adjust when things dont work out as expected...i dont see a reason why a wife should adjust and husband shouldn't.....

7:08 PM  
Blogger Narayanan Venkitu said...

I think you are mostly around Desis...nothing wrong..but its my feeling.

In our society (desi) these things get attached easily to women...and I've seen it go around as well.

I think it is contribution from both. Both have to be blamed. Bottomline - society is evolving...(sic)...is changing thanks to the influence of western cultures. The Good reaches last....bad reaches much earlier.

8:46 PM  
Blogger PVS said...

Nowadays, the divorce rate is increasing. And when people try to find a reason, the only thing that stares at them is the increase in the female literacy rate and the increase in the number of women who work. So this becomes the scape goat.

9:04 PM  
Anonymous B a l a j i said...

Here's one of my colleagues advice for a successful marriage

http://blogsurya.blogspot.com/2005/06/trust.html

9:59 PM  
Blogger TJ said...

"working, educated women get a divorce easily" - why does this sentence need to work up somebody. If it does, the only reason is that, the person thinks that divorce is a taboo, divorcees are intolerent...
For me the sentence makes perfect sense. Yes, working educated women get divorce easily, because they have the financial independence and intelligence to reason. They donot have to put up with any crap, and are bold enought to come out of it, when it is needed.

yes, working, educated women get a divorce easily, for their good, for the societies good.

7:54 AM  
Blogger JaganLee said...

I agree with RamC.
Its not a problem with women, but with male chauvanist society. It'll take some time for our people to come out of it.

12:49 PM  
Blogger KARY said...

I just heard about one such issue very recently. Husband and Wife working, 2 months of married life, full of misunderstanding, Husband blamming wife for not cooking in the morning, husband blamming the wife for getting up late in the morning, Husband blamming wife for coming late from office in the evening and so on... These are from the husband's side. The other side story was unknown. I realised his expectations were too high and was not ready for a compromise. This case made me learn quite a lot about the importance of family life. When i learnt about the other side story I really went furious. The mistake was on the guy but the blame was on the girl. The guy is applying for divorse and not the girl. I pity the girl. She is earning for the family and at last getting the bad name also. This is one incident I noticed right in front. Husbands shd treat their wifes with good dignity. Pengal Aangalku katupattu thaan nadakanum yendra sollu maaranum. Athe maari Pengal oru great SPECIES on EARTH yendra nenappum avangaluku maranum - not against Suguna :) I feel all are EQUAL

9:07 PM  
Blogger Ansh said...

"Marriages are made in heaven as the saying goes, but it has to be worked out in this earth"

very well said!

1:15 PM  
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